London Lingo Caught Me on the Wrong Foot!

The other day, I went with my husband to register for health insurance…yes, something as freakingly important, and yet so mind numbingly ho-hum.
So here we were, in one of these usual medical centers; me, patiently waiting for my Tête à Tête with a general practitioner. I didn’t—thank you sweet God of bored women—have to wait too long. The silver-haired, Miss Marple of a practitioner soon called me in.
Note: Registering for National Health Insurance in the UK is usually clubbed with a general doctor’s check up…but that’s besides the point…
The doctor began her usual checkup of blood pressure and blood glucose…and other blood-stuff. I maintained my poise and grace, as much as possible, till I was faced with the most puzzling question of the decade. For those used to British lingo, this wouldn't be funny or odd in the least. It’s just me, with my SAARC vocabulary, who stammered and stuttered and left the clinic in unnatural hurry, so that the doctor wouldn’t think I was a distilled idiot having a field day. Sample this:
Note: The doctor here was more bored than I was, and was asking me really random questions.
Dr: Are you a carer?
Me: A care…what?
Dr: I said, are you a carer…
Me: Ummm…yes, I am on a dependent visa. So yeah, I am under the care of my husband. (Can you believe I said that?)
Dr: No….you got me wrong….I meant, are you a carer…do you care for old people? More simply put, are you into social service…
Royal shit….yes I care! Couldn’t you have asked this simply? And so I have vowed, I’ll pick up a book on British slang and get a hang of things sooner than you can say ‘I know all about London lingo’. Carer indeed.